Many intellectuals have pondered, is it wrong to compare Cats to the second coming of Jesus? An email from Pope Francis himself stated, “no,” dispelling all previous doubts. This film is, in fact, quite the religious experience. There is no better way to spend 1 hour and 49 minutes of your life than to sit through the absolute rollercoaster that is Cats.
The cat’s out of the bag– spoilers ahead!
Ever wondered what your favorite celebrities would look like if they were hyper-realistic human-cat hybrids? Well, wonder no more! Cat’s all-star cast is transformed into characters with the most creative combination of human and cat features imaginable! The composition of fur-covered human bodies, human faces, cat ears, and tails is not horrifying in the slightest. To tell the truth, the film’s CGI hits Avatar’s (2009) out of the park.
The movie commences with a (fully) human, unnamed character hurling a sack into a dark, seemingly empty alley. Immediately after the human– whose high heels are the only detail that reveals her character– drives away, a flustered-looking human-cat tumbles out of the sack, and an army of human-cats emerges from thin air. But see, these are no regular human-cats; these are singing and dancing cats. As they approach the abandoned feline, they travel on all fours just as toddlers do when they are first learning how to walk– sure to give an audience member a hint of nostalgia. Then, in a blink of an eye, the furry convention migrates towards a fountain and executes a musical performance in perfect synchronization, while fireworks magically erupt in the night sky. This is but one of the many majestic scenes in Cats.
Many more captivating scenes follow, including Rebel William’s fursona chopping down on roaches in the midst of their Rockette-style performance, several cats wearing fursuits that raise questions as to whether or not they engaged in cannibalism, and Jason Derulo jump-starting his singing career as a feline, and so forth.
The fan-favorite scene by far is the closing scene, in which Judi Dench in the role of Old Deutorernonmy, shatters the fourth wall of the film by lecturing the audience on how to properly care for their domestic cats. As the subtitles roll in, many cannot help but complain that the movie is “finally over” as tears rolled profusely down their cheeks. Some people even exclaim that “there is no way this movie costs $15,” as the movie is clearly worth so much more.
“I couldn’t tell if the insightful lyrics about cats not being dogs made me cry tears of joy or pain,” said senior Kaylah Webb.
For quite a few viewers, the emotional weight of Cats was too much, causing them to exit the movie theater early, saying that they couldn’t believe “it was that hard .” Only a few movies ever touch people’s hearts, and Cats are among them. Searching for a superficial movie that will drain brain cells? Then watch Pulp Fiction. But if you are looking for a motion picture that will reach into the depths of one’s soul and mold anyone’s perception of life, then go see Cats.